why we’re all dressing the same

How the Internet Has Ruined Our Sense of Personal Style.

Think about it, every time you log into your phone and go on social media or Pinterest, you start seeing that all the girls are practically wearing the same thing. They all fit into a certain aesthetic; “clean girl,” “Parisian-core,” “how to dress like Hailey Bieber,” “mob wife,” “maximalist thrifty,” “pilates girl,” etc. And while I love trends and jumping on the bandwagon of aesthetics, it made me wonder… what really happened to having a personal style? And not simply a style made up from others.

It’s this strange sameness of modern fashion. Socially, we’re in an era of the tech boom, where we’re quick to snap a pic of ourselves and share it and throw in some hashtags. I’m speaking mainly to my generation, Gen Z, where we were born into the era of MTV, BlackBerrys, and the start of Facebook and Instagram, and now becoming our own versions of being trendsetters and following influencers. But has this had some effect on us and how we style and view ourselves?

We’ve never had access to fashion like we do now. Inspiration is literally at our fingertips. We can see what someone in New York is wearing, what a celebrity wore to dinner last night, what’s trending on TikTok, and what someone bought at Zara all within a few minutes of scrolling. Fashion inspiration used to feel like something you searched for. Now, it finds you.

And while there’s nothing wrong with being influenced and following trends, it’s gotten to a point, though, where we can’t even define what our personal aesthetic and style is anymore, cause we’re just followers. Our algorithms have been overconsuming so much data all at once; well, even within seconds of scrolling, we’re adding to cart on TikTok Shop, following this influencer, saving outfit ideas, mentally changing our aesthetic rapidly.

One day we want to dress like the effortlessly chic girl walking through Paris, the next we want to be a 90s minimalist, and then suddenly we’re buying a faux fur jacket because we’ve decided we’re entering our “mob wife” era. And there’s nothing wrong with any of those styles individually- the problem is when we start collecting aesthetics instead of developing a style of our own.

Trust me, I’m at fault for this. You know how many items I have added to cart over a TikTok video that happened to be on my feed and actually purchased? Or even as a fashion stylist and content creator, how many styles and outfit ideas do I post? A lot. But the problem isn’t being a part of it or adding to it, but actually taking a step back and thinking clearly about what fits us and our aesthetic, lifestyle, and point of view. Not to just be a trend follower, but a confident, fashionable person.

Because personal style isn’t necessarily about never following a trend. In fact, I think trends are one of the most fun parts of fashion. It’s about knowing what to take from them and what to leave behind. You can see a trend, love it, and still decide that it doesn’t belong in your wardrobe. Or maybe you take one part of it and make it your own. That’s where personal style starts to become more interesting.

Use the data, use the content, use these tools to really define what your interests, style, and aesthetic really are. You could argue that we're exposed to so many “aesthetics” that we struggle to simply like something without categorizing it.

Am I classic? Old money? Coquette? Minimalist? Eclectic?

Instead of:

I just like this.

That’s all it takes.

Maybe you like the oversized blazer because you like the way it makes you feel, not because it fits into the “old money” aesthetic. Maybe you love a pair of ballet flats because they’re feminine and comfortable, not because TikTok told you they’re having a moment. Maybe you wear all black because you genuinely like wearing all black.

We don’t always need an explanation for why we like something.

I think the internet has made us feel like everything needs a name. Every outfit needs an aesthetic, every purchase needs to fit into a certain wardrobe, and every new trend needs to become part of our identity. But style is supposed to be personal. It should change as you change, as we change, and sometimes it should simply exist because you like it.

From that shift in your mindset, you’re not just following, you’re defining confidently.

And maybe that’s what personal style is really about. Not figuring out which aesthetic you belong to, but figuring out what you actually like when nobody else is telling you what to like.

-NF